So yeah, here's a couple random social browsing encounters I had the past two weeks.
The first one occurred during my water day at Babylon. There I was diving into the sauna's pool, splashing around, doing the doggie paddle around the deep end -- with random farang in REALLY tight speedos staring at me with questioning and comical looks -- when out walked one of the owners of the Balcony/Telephone Bar (rather not say which).
You know the places if you live here (they're across from each other), but if you don't, they're famous gay hangouts where people have a couple beers (or pink martinis, whatever your persuasion) prior to a night in the foreign gay club, DJ Station. The places are set up so you can watch the parade of gay moving up and down the small alley street as everyone chats it up, gets tipsy, and makes eyes at passing gays.
Anyway, I wrote about this guy before. He knows friends of mine that live downtown, but never talks to me if I'm alone --- only if one of my older, more well-off (?) friends is with me. No surprise I guess, but he treated me exactly the same that day.
I saw him while I was doing the doggie paddle, and attempted a full stop while throwing a wave at him from across the pool, kind of falling under water without the extra hand for swimming.
Well, my speedo-clad audience's gaze moved from me to him, and his reaction: yep, complete avoidance. He made it seem like he completely didn't even see me, and almost as soon as I came up from my unavoidable dunking, he was gone.
Of course, I kept on swimming, and eventually my audience went back to my best backstroke/breast stroke/ Michael Phelps impression.
I was thinking though, what is it exactly that makes this guy less-than friendly? Is it me? Is it that he thinks I don't give him enough business? Is it that he thinks I don't have enough money to be comercially or socially useful to him????
Was it my swimming form?
Well, I know this, I'm not going to hangout at those bars anymore. There's definitely going to be some ownership issues btw, you can't have many owners and not enough visitors to keep everyone happy, chai mai?
Anyway, the problem is that I'm not sure that any of the other alternatives are any nicer. Does anyone know a place they enjoy with a farang owner that will return a wave or a hello :-)???
Ok second thing, after Babylon, my 'friend' and I went to dinner at Richard's. I don't really want to talk about the place so much as what I found. They have this magazine here in Thailand, called Spice, and it is supposedly found in local gay establishments that cater to foreigners on vacation or living here. In it, the publisher (A gentleman I believe is a farang living in Bangkok) provides some really interesting 'tips' for your time in Thailand. I suggest you pick up a copy.
I'll touch on the two things that really got me interested, even if alot of it begs comment :-P.
The first was the publisher's tips when advising foreigners on dealing with people 'begging' for money. He urges you to refrain from giving to the mother and her child or the blind people of the city who are working your local corner. The scams, he says, are everwhere, as he hears stories of people renting their babies, etc.
Ok, I can see the scams are everywhere (somebody asked me the other day if I wanted to 'gamble' with some filipinos and I could win by cheating). But really? Shouldn't we just be happy if someone wants to come to Thailand right now and spend their money, no matter what it might be on? (save for illegal activities of course)
How about this... I don't think you should spend your money on beer here, people say it's causing drinking and driving accidents. Oh, and those go-go boys, I hear they steal, don't spend your money on them either.... Just stay home, I hear crime and scams and stuff are everywhere really :-).
How does someone buy blindness btw? You can trust me on this one, those people singing on the street corners... They're definitely without the ability to see ---- but, they are really good singers.
The other thing that really interested me was a page length summary of rules for 'bar boys' or boys working the go-go clubs. One of the rules advised boys in a playful way to inspect their foreign customer's clothes very carefully. If he is wearing a tie, the rule states, make sure the tie is not a 20 Baht Pratunam (a cheap clothing market) Special. If the tie is in fact one from Pratunam, then the rule states that he is likely an English teacher and therefore unable to truly afford to 'take care' of a bar boy.
Should I rethink my career, or at least buy like a Mercedes --- maybe I should buy a Mercedes.
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I have spent many hours in the Telephone Pub and check out Balcony and Richards occasionally. My opinion is that the managers/owners are all fairly nice guys and seem to look after their staff. Most of the waiters are really great guys and have been working there for many years.
ReplyDeleteBut you are correct, it is an important part of the manager's job to make everyone feel welcome. The pipe smoking manager who left Telephone last year would chat with me one night and totally ignore me the next, and I actually think he is not a bad guy either. The managers do have their favourites and they talk to me just out of courtesy. I know how you feel and if someone opened a new bar with a fresh, welcoming attitude to one and all they would do very well.
The problem is the managers seem a bit jaded, maybe tired, including the waiting staff, working long hours, six or seven days a week. They all need a big holiday away from work and each other.
Some of the expat customers are the same and will totally ignore you after drinking with them the night before. I don't think I am that big a turn off.
The other problem is that the bars get so many customers that are on short holidays and they are making so much money that in the back of their mind the managers don't feel that they have to or have the energy to be nice to everyone.
I am starting to avoid Bangkok now as I find that the bar scene has become boring and the pollution difficult. BTW I don't wear any ties, the boys still chase me but maybe that is why the farangs are avoiding me.
Lol, thanks for your two cents Aussie :-). I agree that not all of them are negative :)! Painting with broad strokes might be my practice, but I do recognize the need for finer details! Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI am interested in your points, but think maybe that the continued flow of money coming in at the bars might slow down to a trickle. Global warming :-) actually a cooling of foreign interest in Thailand. You mention it, and I think there's others that agree. That might hurt the business even at the most 'well-traveled' bar spots.
I didn't mean my long reply to defend the rudeness that you experienced, none of us like being ignored by someone who should know better.
ReplyDeleteIf they take us for granted they do so at their own peril and I am certainly happy to go elsewhere for my entertainment.
Amen Sister :-) No really, I didn't believe you were defending rudeness :-). I just agree that the people aren't all unfriendly and/or angry, maybe just tired :-).
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